It’s Alright to Say No

It’s Alright to Say No

It's Alright to Say No
It’s Alright to Say No

I am sure many of you grew up with the “Just Say No” slogan for not using drugs. But have you thought about applying it to other parts of your life? With technology—Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, email, etc. we are on information overload and are more stressed then ever. And there is this unwritten expectation that everything is an emergency and must be responded to right away!

But does it really?

I’ll let you in on a little secret…Not everything is an emergency and you have a choice! You don’t always have to pick up the phone or respond immediately to the email or even choose the “healthiest” option—but you should make sure you’re making choices for the right reasons.

Make a list of what is important to you and a plan for how you are going to address things that come up that aren’t in your plan. So if you want a dessert or feel like skipping a workout one day, IT’S OK…just make that part of your plan. The concept of Hygge comes from the Danish meaning well-being, comfort, and authenticity. When we are talking well-being we are talking finding a balance between Occupational, Social, Spiritual, Intellectual, Physical, Emotional, Environmental, and Financial health.

If you are questioning whether or not you should say yes to attending something, doing something, etc. ask yourself, what’s in it for me? What’s in it for me? What is the benefit to me personal, professionally, etc. to do FILL IN THE BLANK ….If you can’t find a solid reason to accept the invitation just say no that you are unavailable.

A second tip…

You have to be an advocate for yourself. Yes speaking up can be a challenge, but like anything practice makes perfect. Start small. Create one specific goal like eating a healthier breakfast or going for a walk after lunch or resisting desert after dinner and start to include it in your daily practice. The more you do it the easier it becomes. And yes, you may have a relapse here or there but that is ok… Just start again and don’t beat yourself up! Practice in front of the mirror. You have heard that actors practice/rehearse their lines in front of the mirror, why not try this technique as well. Take 2-3 deep breaths to get in the right mindset and then practice exactly what you would say to someone that asked you to do something you were not interested in or it did not align with what you wanted to do.

Nobody is perfect, but the way you talk to yourself during those imperfect moments can make all the difference. You can beat yourself up for an off conversation, or you can learn from it. When you catch yourself thinking negatively, stop, take a deep breath, reflect on what happened, and let it go. If you need to take a longer breathe or step outside for a walk to remove your self from the situation. Do it.

You are in charge of yourself. So when things are not going the way you had hoped, step back, reflect, take a deep breath and say no if you need to.

Don’t worry about what others think, yes saying no can be a hard thing for us to do but remember to practice and you will be just fine.

4 thoughts on “It’s Alright to Say No”

  1. Yes to your no!! I’m a big fan of the motto “If it’s not a big, whopping Hell Yes, then it’s a no.” Thank you for the reminder and permission to not have to return every text message instantly or do things that don’t feel right for me 🙂

  2. HI. As women, we are taught from an early age to be nice, be pleasant, do good for everybody, and to be people pleasers. We are not taught to be assertive and to think of ourselves first. Learning to say “NO” is hard, but it really is a first step to taking care of ourselves first. Thanks for the insight.

  3. Thank you for your explanation of Hygge and affirming it’s ok to say no or to have a lapse day. And I agree with “If you can’t find a solid reason to accept the invitation just say no that you are unavailable”. I absolutely hate having to come up with an acceptable excuse. Take care!

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